Bob Elliott of the Bob and Ray comedy team tells of an extraordinary ride he took on a bus in New York City: The driver greeted all the riders by saying, “No smiling, please!” The passengers, some of them shoppers hefting packages up the steps, looked at the driver in amazement. Then they smiled. Even… Continue reading Bus Stopper
My feisty 70-year-old neighbor Frances had to call a furnace repairman. After a quick inspection the man put some oil into the motor and handed her a $70 bill for labor. “Labor charges!” Frances exclaimed. “It only took you five minutes.” The repairman explained that his company had a minimum one-hour charge on every house… Continue reading Labor Charges
At a gardening store, I told the young clerk I needed some potting soil. “Over there,” she answered, “in 40-pound bags.”
It was a lovely day, and I decided to sit on a park bench to enjoy the warmth and flowers. Two elderly men were sitting nearby. “You know, if I had a choice of where I were to die.”
My sister, Ruby, and I decided to leave home and get a place of our own. We went to a crowded auction where we spotted a bed that would be perfect.
My husband, Robert, repeatedly told me how relaxing he found the steam room in the YMCA. Since I had never used one before, I decided to give it a try. I opened the door, went into the empty room and sat down. It was warm and comfortable, and I thought: Robert’s right. This is great!… Continue reading Steam Room
TOURIST: One who travels to see things that are different and then complains when they aren’t the same. -Dublin Opinion EDUCATION: What’s left when you’ve forgotten everything you ever learned. -Quoted by George Plimpton in Esquire JOURNALIST: A person with nothing on his mind and the power to express it. -Russell Baker, There’s a Country… Continue reading In Other Words